Alien in My Homeland

This morning I realized that I am an alien in my own country. I was out walking at the Indian Airlines ground opposite the Military Camp in Santacruz (a western suburb in Mumbai, India)when I bumped into an elderly gentleman. We have seen one another almost everyday but never exchanged greetings. All that changed this morning.

I passed Mr. X on the track and heard the words good morning. I turned around to find him smiling; I returned the greeting and continued walking. After 45 minutes I decided to call it quits and plonked meself on a plastic chair in the lawn. I could sense a gaze and looked to my right, there was Mr. X.

He introduced himself and I was forced to do the same to avoid coming across as plain rude. As happens mostly in India, his first question was your name sounds south Indian, where are you from? I told him I was born in a place called Palakkad in Kerala on the Kerala-Tamil Nadu border but have lived in Mumbai all my life except the first six months after birth. For those interested in geography, Palakkad is about 60 minutes by road from the business center of Coimbatore in Tamil Nadu.

Immediately Mr. X said, then you are a Keralite. I looked at him and politely said no, I am a Mumbaikar (the equivalent of a New Yorker in NY). He smiled and said no, since you were born in Kerala, you can only be a Keralite. I could have but didn't refute him. I said bye and walked away thinking to meself, am I a Mumbaikar or am I a Keralite.

The educated call people like me TamBrams (short for Tamil Brahmins). This term is used to describe Tamil speaking brahmins from Palakkad whose ancestors are believed to have migrated from Tanjavur (Tanjore of old) some 400 to 500 years ago.

I reached home and called my cousin in Kerala. My first question, Would you agree if I called meself a Keralite? Prompt came the answer, NO. I was lost for words. I asked him why? His answer was simple: You don't belong here...you studied in Mumbai, lived all you life in Mumbai, then how can you call yourself a Keralite? I thanked him for his frank views and put the phone down.

I sat to have breakfast but couldn't focus. My mind was working overtime. I am not a Mumbaikar, I am not a Keralite. So who am I?

Suddenly the thought stuck me that if not anything I am an Indian. I was just about feeling happy when my enthusiasm collapsed. Indian? does that count for anything in today's India, I thought. The answer stuck me like a bolt of lightning. No, being Indian means nothing in today's context.

In today's emerging India it is important to be identified by place, caste, religion and all other possible mutated versions of identity. Being an Indian is just not good enough.

So dear friends tomorrow if the Shiv Sena or any other political party decides that people like me ain't good enough to live in Mumbai and start targeting us, where do I go? Certainly not Kerala, I may get the same treatment there.

If I cannot stay in my karmabhoomi (where I made my life) and in my janmabhoomi (where I was born), then there is little chance of any other state in the country accepting me. So what does that make me? the humble Indian?

An Indian without a state, an Indian in search of No Man's land. If such a situation does arise in future, what are my options. Are they a) seeking political asylum in some other country; b) changing my name to blend with the mob; and/or c) staying put and getting lynched by a mob ghost led by self-serving politicians.

As of now, I don't know. But what I know for sure is that being Indian must have greater value, must mean more than the word. That is what is lacking in today's India. We are First--Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Maharashtrians, Gujarathis, Malayalees, SC/STs, OBCs and all other identities, then as an afterthought, Indian.

The need of the hour is a radical shift in thinking. We need to be Indians first and Indians last. Will I see that happening in my lifetime? It's anybody's guess.